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Julia & Ashley's first dance ~ JDRF Charity Ball ~ April 2014
My Dearest Middle School Daughters,
With the first year of middle school, and all its
new friends-boys-cell phones-social media-common core drama, nearly behind us
(for summer anyway), I have found myself constantly reflecting on just how
different the world you are navigating is from the one in which I grew up. The following are a few nuggets of wisdom
that life has bestowed upon me, which have stood the test of time (and
technology), and will serve you well in the years to come.
“People
will love you. People will hate you. And none of it will have anything to do
with you.” ~Abraham Hicks
Know
that every single person in this world is insecure about something. These insecurities can be displayed in
unflattering outward behaviors, ranging from bragging and bullying to
pretending not to care. This is often
because of some past emotional scar or present painful circumstance. You will save yourself a great deal of
heartache if you understand other people’s behavior is rarely about you, but
has everything to do with how they feel about themselves and what is going on
in their own lives.
Never ever look into the eyes of
another person (boys especially) in search of your value. Mirrors are made for such things. You are so much more than the number of likes
you receive or followers you have on Instagram, or the labels you sport to
school. There will be friends – the
super smart ones – who will notice your inner awesome as well as your outward
flare, but YOU need to recognize it first.
You must own all that you are before your full potential can be unlocked
and displayed for others to see. So put
down your phone and look at yourself and the world through your own lens and
not that of your phone’s camera. As Glinda, from The Wizard of Oz, in all her
glittery goodness so aptly said, “You have always had the power, my Dear; you
just had to learn it for yourself.”
Kindness is cool and manners rock. Be kind and thoughtful to everyone, even
those who don’t deserve it. (Especially
them.) The smallest kindness, compliment
or gesture could change the course of someone’s day or life even. Truly. It is as easy to lift people up as it is to
put them down and it feel SO much better.
The beauty of kindness is that it also makes your day. A word of caution: kindness is not to be
confused with pleasing. Pleasing is an
unhealthy form of kindness often leading to one-sided, hurtful relationships.
Trust your gut. Listen to the tiny voice inside yourself that
tells you something is right or wrong.
You will rarely make a mistake if you do this. If you don’t want to do something, don’t. No explanation necessary. Better yet, blame me. “Sorry, my mom won’t let me. And she can be a nightmare!” This strikes fear and instant understanding
in the heart of anyone with a parent.
Get involved and be open to new
experiences and friends.
Try out for a sport, join a club and learn who you are. Most importantly, try to look at those
community service hours as more than a graduation requirement you are obligated
to fulfill. Charity work is one of the
most meaningful things you will ever do in your lifetime. It will directly and profoundly impact you
and the person or cause you are helping in immeasurable and lasting ways.
Slow
down, have a ball and LOL every single day. In the words of Henry David Thoreau, “Live in each season as it passes;
breathe the air, drink the drink (soda, slushies, cider, hot chocolate – ok,
mom’s words, not Thoreau’s), taste the fruit, and resign yourself to the influences
of each.” Don’t be in such a rush
to be older. Truly enjoy and treasure this
time. Soon enough you will long for the
days when someone else bought the groceries, washed your clothes, paid the
bills and told you to turn off your phone and go to bed on time.
Until then,
Be you, be nice and know that I love you beyond
words,
Mommy
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